” I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbour said ‘Are you going to help?’ I said ‘No, six should be enough. “


” I can always tell when the mother in law’s coming to stay, the mice throw themselves on the traps. “


” I took my mother-in-law to Madame Tussaud’s Chamber of Horrors, and one of the attendants said: ‘Keep her moving sir, we’re stock-taking. “


” I’ve just had some bad news. Tomorrow is the mother in law’s funeral. And she’s cancelled it. “


” Mind you, I’ve always been musical… Mother used to sit me on her knee and I’d whisper, ‘Mummy, Mummy, sing me a lullaby do,’ and she’d say: ‘Certainly my angel, my wee bundle of happiness, hold my beer while I fetch me banjo. “


” My mother-in-law has so many wrinkles, when she smiles she looks like a Venetian blind. “


” I’m often accused of saying some pretty rotten things about my mother-in-law. But quite honestly, she’s only got one major fault – it’s called breathing. “


” I’m not saying my mother didn’t like me, but she kept looking for loopholes in my birth certificate. “


” The mother-in-law came round last week. It was absolutely pouring down. So I opened the door and I saw her there and I said, ‘Mother, don’t just stand there in the rain. Go home. “


” My mother-in-law’s so fat that when she passes her handbag from hand to hand she throws it. “



All 10 Les Dawson Quotes about Mother in picture


I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbour said
I can always tell when the mother in law
I took my mother-in-law to Madame Tussaud
I
Mind you, I
My mother-in-law has so many wrinkles, when she smiles she looks like a Venetian blind.
I
I
The mother-in-law came round last week. It was absolutely pouring down. So I opened the door and I saw her there and I said,
My mother-in-law

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