” When I got on Stern I realized that this was the one job where you could be really honest and open, almost like Richard Pryor or something. You can be honest about your life and get laughs. “
” The point of drinking in moderation is that sometimes you don’t drink in moderation. “
” I have been in a lot of movies, but none of them are critics’ darlings, you might say. “
” Have you ever Googled yourself? I did, most depressing thing ever. People have websites hoping I die at 38. “
” It’s a life of five-card draw, and you know what? When God asked me – I’m fine with the card I got. I’m gonna play this. “
” When you’re an adult, when times are good, entire years go by in what feels like the space of one season. But the worst trick time plays on you is just how slowly the worst times in your life take you to live through. “
” When you did impressions on ‘MADtv,’ the producers gave you a Walkman that played huge sections of whatever movie was being parodied, with your character’s catchphrases recorded on a loop. You’d wear this thing around during rehearsals and for a week listen to the voice you had to impersonate over and over again. It drove all of us crazy. “
All 7 Artie Lange Quotes about You in picture





Topics: You quotes